Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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