Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Randomize
