went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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