my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Is there a zoo near here? I need to see some penguins like right now..
I am not bailing you of of jail
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
