I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
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