Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
My feet surprised me
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