Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
Please don't give away my fajitas
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize