Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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