Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
The girls stopped by my apartment. They caught me naked with a nearly empty bottle of vodka in one hand, drawing crop circles in the carpet with the vacuum.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
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