her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize