: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
