Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize