So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and she was petting her beer can
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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