you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
We were making out when she went into convulsions. At least now I know she's allergic to peanuts.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Randomize