doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
