oh god the rape fog is back!
farters have to be the big spoon...
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
