he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
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