I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
His hands were made for my vagina.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
