garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Houston, we have a blender
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Randomize