omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Randomize
