he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize