You don't have asthma, your pregnant
After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
Randomize