this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
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