is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
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