Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
