Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
