dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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