its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
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