I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
