Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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