I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize
