I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
this boner is exhausting
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how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
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How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
They are going to name an STD after you.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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