i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
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We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
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