everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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