I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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