That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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