I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
