Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize