Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
