Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I am drinking at a movie theater seeing a children's movie, 2nd time this week
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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