Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
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yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
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You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
He took me out to dinner to tell me we had to stop fucking so randomly
Honestly wish he pleased me as much as queso does
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
I kept yelling "BY ORDER OF THE PEAKY FUCKING BLINDERS" in a terrible brummie accent at everyone I saw wearing a flatcap.
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