Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
