I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize