IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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