we have pet lesbian snakes
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
