Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
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