It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
His room was full of guns. It was like having sex with Clint Eastwood.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
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