my vag is so smooth its legendary
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
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