I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
