I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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