In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
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